Annoying Status Message #5 8:07 PM

i'm getting into my girlfriend's pants. you all need to know this. not. kidding about the not. ANNOYING STATUS MESSAGES

haha sorry man

About This Blog #4 8:00 PM

To all stalkers (those who anonymously read my blog with secret contempt):

STOP.

About This Blog #3 12:00 AM

ok, how 2 maek dis blog more positive? all I do is talk stink. es too many fuglies.

Annoying Status Message #4 11:56 PM

I am doing the opposite of what everybody thought I was going to do, only because I'm a nonconformist. Now, because you all care, and because people actually care enough to talk about me, go spread the word that I'm not doing what you all thought! ANNOYING STATUS MESSAGES

My Day #14 7:56 PM

sup

Six hours of studying. Four hours of sleep. Half a NoDoz.

Uhuh, the biology test was today. I studied for six hours straight last night until 2:00AM. Eff me for procrastinating again (Procrastinaiton Account #4). During my intense study session, I asked some upperclassmen how this biology test was going to be. Nolan told me it was 80 questions with no fill-in portion. OKay, cool.

7:20AM, I struggled to wake up. Downed a big yummy potato-ham scramble (thanks mom) and was off to school. After first period, I took the history test. Uhuh I didn't mention it before because it don matter son. I think I did pretty well for 45 minutes of studying.

After history was lunch. I asked people who had just taken the test how it was. They moved right along, mouth open, eyes droopy, pants wet. So this, in turn, made me wet myself, so I changed into the shorts I packed for tennis practice. With damp underwear I sat nervously during Spanish, thinking about the test.

k im bored now: bascially I took teh test adn it wanst dat hard and I htink I did prety well get off me

howz dat 4 a blog post, eh! :|

I Hate This #5 7:49 PM

yo wsup I haven't been playing long but I think I'm good nonetheless. hey, dude, you're twisting your wrist, that's why your hits are like that. I know what I'm talking about because I have experience and so I can patronize you. lulz u suk im bettr

WAHBOOM

Illustration #1 11:01 AM

This drawing is pretty old, but I thought I'd post it here anyway.

Annoying Status Message #3 6:19 PM

wE sH0ulD go 2 the beach, pinkberry, yogurt land, or dEl aM0 or any other place that would make me cooler by going there ! :] awwww poor someone I know ! one of my friends said something inappropriate and is apparently worth putting in my status [:

2 dO: items on agenda that make me seem academically superior to you because they aren't due for weEks . ANNOYING STATUS MESSAGES

I Hate This #4 6:10 PM

Normally this wouldn't be posted, but I'm doing it for the members of the "club" EXCLUSIVE REFERENCE don't get mad reader, plz.

"HI! I'M NOT SINGLE SO I LIKE TO TELL GUYS TO BACK OFF GUYS AS IF I'M ATTRACTIVE AND DON'T USE 20 POUNDS OF MAKEUP. I LIKE TO POST PICTURES OF ME NOT SMILING ON MYSPACE BECAUSE IT REFLECTS MY INNER SELF AND BECAUSE THE ONLY WAY I CAN LOOK DECENT IN A PICTURE IS IF I DON'T SMILE, AND EVEN THOUGH MYSPACE IS SUPPOSED TO BE YOU, I SAY 'DON'T JUDGE ME BASED ON MYSPACE, JUDGE ME ON WHO I AM' WHICH IS TOTALLY POINTLESS BECAUSE EVERYBODY WILL THINK I'M A COMPLETE DOUCHEBAG ANYWAY FOR SAYING THAT. I LIKE TO SAY I HATE DRAMA EVEN THOUGH I'M ALWAYS AROUND IT. I LIKE TO BE PRETENTIOUS ABOUT ART, POLITICS, SCHOOL, AND BASICALLY EVERYTHING ELSE. THE WAY I FIGHT PEOPLE WHO DON'T LIKE ME IS THROUGH PETTY, MEAN-GIRLS, MIDDLE-SCHOOL TACTICS IN WHICH I INDOCTRINATE ALL MY FRIENDS TO HATE MY ENEMIES. I LIKE TO PASSIVELY CONDESCEND MY COLLEAGUES AND FEEL SUPERIOR TO THEM THOUGH I HAVE NOTHING TO JUSTIFY SAID BEHAVIOR. I LIKE TO FEEL SUPERIOR IN MY ACADEMIC SKILLS AND BRAG ABOUT THEM THOUGH THEY DO NOT AMOUNT TO ANYTHING. I LIKE TO BRAG ABOUT HOW BAD AND ANNOYING MY DAD IS WHEN I'M STILL A CONFUSED, ANGSTY TEENAGER WHO CAN'T GET ALONG WITH ANYONE BECAUSE I'M NOT MATURE ENOUGH TO DEAL WITH HORMONES AND CHANGES. I LIKE TO BE LOUD AND LAUGH CONSTANTLY AT THINGS THAT AREN'T FUNNY. I LIKE TO MURDER SOMETHING FUNNY UNTIL ITS SOUL IS OBLITERATED. I LIKE ALWAYS LIKE TO INSINUATE THAT SOMEONE IS WRONG, BUT I'LL NEVER SAY IT TO THEIR FACE--I'LL JUST KEEP A SMILE ON MY FACE AND THEN TALK TO YOU BEHIND YOUR BACK LATER. I'M ALWAYS RIGHT. WHEN I'M WRONG, I'LL JUST LAUGH. I LIKE TO THINK THAT I'M HOT. I GET A LOT OF BOYS NUMBERS. I KNOW SO MANY PEOPLE'S NAMES. I'M IMPORTANT! I LIKE TO HANG AROUND EVERYONE AND BE POPULAR. I LIKE TO DISRESPECT MY CLASSMATES. I LIKE TO YELL AT THEM AND TELL THEM TO SHUT UP BECAUSE I AM SOMEBODY. I'M THE FAKEST PERSON IN THE WORLD AND NO ONE WILL KNOW MY PERSONALITY BECAUSE I DON'T REALLY HAVE ONE AND I DON'T SERVE MUCH OF A PURPOSE OTHER THAN BEING AROUND A LOT OF PEOPLE AND LAUGHING LIKE A TRANSVESTITE GASPING FOR AIR. I SUCCEED AT MAKING PEOPLE'S BLOOD BOIL. I'M A PRETENTIOUS, PONTIFICATING, FAKE, CONTENTIOUS, SELF-IMPORTANT, MELODRAMATIC, CONDESCENDING, PASSIVE-AGGRESSIVE, BOY-CRAZY, SELF-CONSCIOUS, OBJECTIFYING, USING, GOSSIPING, TWO-FACED, BEHIND-PEOPLE'S-BACK-TALKING, ANNOYINGLY LAUGHING, SELF-ABSORBED, DISRESPECTING, WANNABE EMO, MYSPACE WHORING BAD PERSON DEMON SPAWN FROM THE DEPTHS OF WORTHLESS HELL STINKING PILE OF COW DUNG, FIGURATIVELY SPEAKING, AND THE ONE PERSON YOU NEVER WANT TO SEE, HEAR, FEEL, TALK TO, SMELL, OR BE IN THE PRESENCE OF BECAUSE I WILL KILL YOU BY MAKING YOUR BLOOD BOIL, MAKING YOU KILL YOURSELF, OR JUST BY MY EXISTENCE ALONE."

Annoying Status Message #2 10:19 PM

why are my girlfriend and I listing places on where to have sex? this is supposed to be funny. ANNOYING STATUS MESSAGES

Annoying Status Message #1 12:10 AM

New series, yo.

... here is a list of words that describes my girlfriend. of course, none of you would get it because I'm referring to exclusive events and inside jokes. Don't hate me if you wasted your time reading this. Too late. ANNOYING STATUS MESSAGES